Pervilicious

I have been forced to write this entry because of the magntitude of how perverse my buddy Naja is.
Naj Naj is quick to admire what is beautiful, a talent he must have acquired from sitting in in the "beauty shop" for the better half of a day. but he is just as quick to diss things that are less than perfect. Dont go and see Naja if your feeling a bit bloated, he'll be sure to call you a geri falhi or something worse, dont go and see him if you have a pimple on your face he'll recommend some cream(but not before calling you some offensive name).hehehe. but you can't help but love him such a squishable huggable person.
I have become immune to perverts from hanging out with naja for so long. Somedays he just sits with me in cafe's and talks to my boobs. he'd go like: "hello, would you shake for me a lil,move up and down........hehehh. Kulhandhili, uramathi, heeslaa thankolhu, foah, thina, Buhjaadi, findhraanee, buriya jaha......these are the words that are bound to come out in his conversations. I bet you all heard the song Kaho nakaho,..the Hindi version of Tamally maak by Amr Diab.. well naja made this song for jameels break up with Shuaikaar its called Nudhenya Thalhan. he came to a conclusion that shuaikar must have split with Jameel because she wouldnt put out......what other worldly reason could their be.....beats me.
Oh wait Mayaa hoki, Amayey, Hus Dhogu these are the most recent additions to his rich offensive vocab. Iyadh used to be his very own personal pinata(pronounced pinyata). kalhu balhu, Kalhu bakari a few of his cute lil pet names for iyadh who is from the dark side. Thank god the boy has a heart of gold the only response you'd get out of him is a giggle or maybe a snort.

Naja has a new obsession these days which is designing locks. go figure. he carries the blue prints around in his wallet. A very small sketch on an even smaller note paper. Although what i think he should be pursuing is bringing out an album of pervy songs. He could bring out a dozen with his existing material.

he recently lost a great deal of weight and is particularly critical of people with generous figures. He started calling shiuna fala fat way before he started losing any weight(His ass was spilling out the sides of his ancient chair that hasnt been dusted for 50 years, when he stole the priviledge). You can imagine the amount of stuff he'd have to say now. But no one really takes the stuff he has to heart because "its naja" after all.

The only time that i saw him shut his trap was on the night that nishath gave him a piece of his mind. I was waiting for the day someone would step up and take a go at Naja....nothing personal though...Well it was fun while it lasted but afterwards naja was like. hmpph he doesnt make any sense at all. i Just didnt wanna look even stupider by challenging someone stupid.

Thats him..the Naja that we all love.

How can i not love him..he gave me a big brown teddy bear just like him for my birthday.

Mwah

btw Naja's birthday is coming its the 22nd of April

Sex and Sensitivity

Well i'll take it for granted that all of you including all you perky sistas and holier than thou brothers watch porn. As for me i have been fascinated by Porn ever since i was about 14. Well i am not goin to go into further detail on that...hehe..for your sake. The best porn movie that i ever got to watch was some barbarian theme adult movie. I still havent been able to find a copy of it to this day. I am telling you it was quality porn.

But you see i dont know why but i get turned on more by sex scenes from movies than by watching porn. i used to always sneak around the house with my sisters copy of Don Juan. Porn doesnt quite have the same effect on me. Maybe its because of the emotions involved the sensuality. Or maybe its because of the tease factor. Brad pitt might show his tight butt but wont turn the other way. Or Monica Belluchi might show her perfect breasts but hide her Punani.

Humans always want whats hard to get and what they cant have. No one really wants the "easy come, easy go" ,but might use it. I guess its the same with porn. Since all the unmentionables are so in the face it doesnt quite do the trick, well not unless your so sexually deprived you could fuck the hole in the sink.

But there are people like my brother who just really appreciate the beauty of nude bodies. He is happily married and has succesfully knocked up his wife the true one and only love of his life.

Beleive it or not but i just dont have the urge to watch porn anymore since i am an off camera porn star myself hehehe.

Heads up: there are some excellent humping scenes in 300...the flava of the year

Liarrr!!!

I really dont understand why people lie for no reason. I would be the biggest liar on earth if i said i've never lied in my life....Ofcourse i have and i still do? My mums supposed to think that i dont smoke. But this sorta white lie which you easily see through....most of the time, helps you out of some very uncomfy situations. (If any kiddy widdys are reading my blog taint the best thing to resort to ....like ever). Sometimes the truth is better untold....like how you got knocked up and had the kid flushed out, or how you dont have any faith in god, or how you like to sniff dunlop from time to time and masturbate watching tele tubbies.

But your not just a liar your a fraud and an imposter when you tell people that you've done your PHD or had lunch with Tyra Banks. If your one of em who likes to stretch the truth or just create history out of thin air, ask yourself why you do it? Is it because you would like the people to think you are fabulous? Well someone might beleive you for a second but when the truth comes out....you'll be the laughing stock and the untrustable hypocrite. A lot of Maldivians tend to take this path(i havent done a survey or anything but very short people with big heads mostly). One such example is Mathee...well if you happened to go to City garden last year you might have seen him. He is hard to miss being a maldivian blond(shame!!!...no blue eyes). Well this lil bugger would come and sit with us, i used to think he was being friendly but later i realized that he just wanted to share his ability to fabricate. According to him he was the owner of City garden, and he had a luxury penthouse...god knows where and with a fully stocked bar. Seems all he needed was a wife to share his wealth with. Apparently he was in a realtionship with a German tart and had tatooed a love letter she had sent to him on his ass.....that is right on his teeny weeny microscopic tooshy. i wonder if that twist in the tale was meant to wow me....i mean like wow...hehehe. Oh! and then the hair, he had two strands of weak hair flying in the wind when he said that not long back he had had dread locks that reached upto his ass crack......i mean like could he be any cooler. Oh my and the 14,000 dollar watch that he wore.....i wonder if they still sell those at Makhma on Chaandhanee Magu. he also told me how was the BUTLAA(butler) at HILTANH(Hilton) and FOUR SEASANH(Four Seasons) and had deejayed at both resorts plus in Germany. In the end he turned to be just a waiter or supervisor at the Cafe' who occasionally liked to take advantage of girls stupid enough to drink with him. In the end when he went missing from City garden we found out that he had been fired for slackin off....well this ending made the BUTLAA the subject for many of my wise cracks.

In truth none of the lies he told were harmful for me or anyone else for that matter. Lies just come back and bite the liarr in the ass. People get tired of listening to your phony baloney and wont even beleive you when you tell the truth. But i know this is a very serious condition and can only be cured by intensive therapy. It seems that a painful or embarrasing past shapes you into a two faced liar. You cant simply confront the liar and tell him or to her face and be done with it. If worse comes to worse the liar will just move onto another unsuspecting group and start his game of deception. But mind you that by the time your 30 most of the people around you will be aware of your disease and will try and avoid the afliction and you will be left alone.

Sometimes making up too many stories will confuse you about who you are in reality. So dont be a fool and lose yourself. You know your the coolest!! and people who can't accept you for who you are can just shove it. Look at paris hilton she is a super rich bitch but nobody likes her..this goes to show that material may buy slaves, tag alongs and fancy gadgetry but they wont buy you friends. I know you dont have a Lamborghini, but i still love you.

4th Monthersary

I dont care for reason or rhyme

I am in love for the very first time

This time i am gonna follow through

Cos i am so in love with you

Baby you know your the one for me

and i am so happy cos i know you see

Me, for the person that i truly am

I am your vanilla coated strawberry Jam

You are just so easy to love baby

I am so sure about you, no buts or maybe

Its your sweet lips i wanna kiss

And your warm embrace that i miss

I just thought that i'd pour my heart out today

In the hope that you will forever stay

With me until the very end

through bumpy roads and every bend

Nisa: this is for you baby..........I love you....Idhee and Nisa forever

(i know i am a hopeless romantic so beequas if you wanna barf at my love dovey rhymes go ahead............hehehe. )

The Gay, The Bi and the Ugly

have you read the story of the witche's. Where a shit load of witches were among humans and no one even had a clue they were turning little kids into rats. Well its sorta like the same thing....but maybe a lil creepier. Look out theres one behind you, checkin out your ye ass. Which brings me to the topic du jour. Homosexuals!!!

Homosexuals have been around since the beginning of time. There was a time in a certain city "Sadoom" where gay people were commiting sodomy on the streets. but most of the time Homosexuals have remained in hiding beacuse it is not the societal norm to be gay. Well Gay activists are on the rise now and pretty soon we straight people will be the odd ones out. For centuries the bigger and better part of a population have been straight. Nowadays people want something new something different in all aspects of life. We want to colour our hair green we want to pierce all our pieces of dangling flesh, Lick em carpets and want to be anally assaulted (no offense if you get pleasure do it). Bisexuals are a different story altogether, i mean if you are turned on by a woman why tip over to the dark side....Well to each his own i aint perfect so i cant really judge...just stating my opinion.

But if its hormonal the individual is really helpless..I mean can it really be helped??

Well our religion has no exceptions for homosexuals, Boy george is still gonna be judged as a man no matter how much make up he wears, or even if "Your colours can light my dreams". It can never be natural eventhough it is acceptable. They cant reproduce can they... But i am thankful for all the gay fashion designers and musicans and artists for their famiculine touch.

Orgies and group sex sessions give birth to homosexuals too. Let me not even go into the subject of drug addicts who abuse their own. It is not cool or exciting...more like sickening...

But i have a lot of gay friends some of em even married and livin happily ever after(in this world). A friend is a friend i cant be bothered by their sexuality(Stand up comics would have less jokes to crack if all of us were straight). Just keep doing what you think is right. "Do ye thang lemme do my THANG- which is having amazing straight sex"